• A commitment phobe is someone who has a fear of committing to long-term relationships or making serious decisions.
Commitment phobes are like cats; they enjoy the thrill of the chase but quickly lose interest once they’ve caught their prey. They may be hesitant to commit due to past traumas, such as a bad breakup or childhood abandonment issues, which have left them feeling vulnerable and afraid to get hurt again. Or maybe they just really love being single and don’t want anyone cramping their style!
• Narcissists are individuals who have an excessive sense of self-importance and lack empathy for others.
Narcissists think that the world revolves around them – it’s not just you! They often crave attention and admiration from others, believing themselves to be superior in every way possible. Unfortunately, this can lead them down a path of manipulation and exploitation when it comes to romantic relationships. It’s hard enough dealing with one ego in a relationship – imagine having two!
• Both commitment phobes and narcissists tend to avoid intimacy and vulnerability in their relationships.
Intimacy? Yuck! Vulnerability? No thanks! Commitment phobes and narcissists alike prefer keeping things light-hearted rather than deepening emotional connections with another person. For commitment-phobic folks, getting too close means risking rejection or heartbreak; for narcissistic types, showing any kind of weakness means admitting imperfection (and we can’t have that!).
• Commitment phobes may feel suffocated by the idea of settling down, while narcissists may view themselves as too important to be tied down.
For some people, marriage equals death…of freedom anyway. The thought of being stuck with one person forever sends shivers up their spine (or makes them run screaming into the night). Meanwhile, narcissistic personalities believe that no one could possibly measure up to how awesome they are – why limit yourself?
• Narcissistic behavior can often lead to toxic relationships where the other person feels used or unimportant.
Narcissists are like black holes – they suck up all the attention and energy in a relationship, leaving their partner feeling drained and neglected. They may use emotional manipulation tactics such as gaslighting or guilt-tripping to get what they want, without any regard for how it affects others. It’s not just selfishness; it’s an art form!
• While both types may struggle with emotional attachment, commitment phobes tend to fear abandonment, whereas narcissists fear losing control over their partners.
Commitment-phobic people have been hurt before (or so they think), which makes them hesitant to let anyone too close out of fear that history will repeat itself. Narcissists on the other hand need constant validation from their partner and will do anything to maintain power in the relationship. Both fears stem from deep-seated insecurities but manifest differently depending on personality type.
• It’s possible for someone to exhibit traits of both a commitment phobe and a narcissist simultaneously.
If you’re unlucky enough to date someone who has these two personality types rolled into one package…well good luck! This kind of person might be hot one minute then cold the next – keeping you guessing about whether they’ll stick around long-term or move onto greener pastures. Just remember: don’t take it personally if your significant other seems more interested in themselves than you sometimes – it’s not you, it’s them!
• Therapy can help address these issues, but it requires willingness on the part of the individual seeking treatment.
Therapy isn’t just for crazy people (although we love those folks too!). If either commitment-phobia or narcissism is wreaking havoc on your romantic life, therapy can provide tools for overcoming negative patterns while fostering healthier ways of relating to others. However, change won’t happen unless there is genuine motivation to do so, which can be tough when you’re used to being in control (or avoiding it altogether).
P.S. You should check out these commitment phobia books at Amazon. (affiliate link)