• A hot and cold commitment phobe may show intense interest in a relationship one moment, then suddenly withdraw.
– They might be all over you like white on rice one day, but the next day they’re as distant as Pluto. It’s frustrating and confusing for their partner because they can’t predict what mood their lover will be in from one minute to the next.
• This behavior can be confusing and frustrating for their partner, who may feel like they’re constantly on an emotional rollercoaster.
– It’s like being stuck on a never-ending amusement park ride where your heart is racing with excitement one second, only to plummet into despair the next. But instead of cotton candy at the end, there’s just confusion and tears.
• Hot and cold commitment phobes often struggle with feelings of vulnerability and fear when it comes to relationships.
– The thought of opening up emotionally scares them more than spiders or clowns combined. They’ve built walls around themselves so high that even Trump would approve.
• They may have experienced past traumas or abandonment that make them hesitant to fully commit to someone else.
– Maybe mommy didn’t love them enough growing up or daddy left without saying goodbye. Whatever it was, it scarred them for life and now they find it hard to trust anyone who gets too close.
• Despite this hesitancy, hot and cold commitment phobes often crave intimacy and connection just as much as anyone else.
– Deep down inside they want nothing more than true love that lasts forever (cue Whitney Houston). But getting there requires taking risks which makes them break out in hives.
• However, they may sabotage their own chances at finding love by pushing away potential partners or creating drama in the relationship.
– Just when things start going well between two people – bam! Suddenly everything falls apart faster than Britney Spears’ marriage(s).
• It’s important for both parties involved to communicate openly about expectations and boundaries in order to navigate a relationship with a hot/cold commitment phobe.
– Set some ground rules, like how many times they’re allowed to ghost you before it’s game over. Communication is key, just like the combination lock on your diary.
• Therapy can also be helpful for individuals struggling with these issues.
– Sometimes talking to someone who doesn’t know you from Adam can work wonders. A therapist might even have some tips on how to deal with their emotional baggage (and yours too).
• Hot and cold commitment phobes may have a fear of losing their independence or freedom in a relationship.
– They don’t want anyone cramping their style or telling them what to do. It’s not that they don’t love you; it’s just that they need space – lots of it.
• They often struggle with making long-term plans, such as moving in together or getting married.
– The thought of being tied down forever makes them break out into hives again. Maybe one day they’ll change their mind but until then, let’s take things slow.
• This type of behavior can also stem from a fear of being hurt or rejected by their partner.
– Nobody likes rejection but for hot/cold commitment phobes, it feels like the end of the world every time someone says no thanks. So instead of putting themselves out there again, they’d rather play games than risk getting hurt.
• Hot and cold commitment phobes may project their own insecurities onto their partner causing unnecessary conflict in the relationship.
– If I’m feeling insecure about myself then everyone else must feel the same way too! That kind of thinking leads to fights over nothing which only adds fuel to an already raging fire.
• It’s important for partners to establish trust and build emotional intimacy slowly over time with hot/cold commitment phobes.
– You wouldn’t try running before learning how to walk first would you? The same principle applies here. Take things one step at a time and before you know it, they might be ready to take the plunge.
• These individuals may benefit from learning healthy communication skills, boundary-setting techniques, and coping mechanisms for managing anxiety related to relationships.
– It’s like going back to school but instead of algebra or Shakespearean literature, hot/cold commitment phobes will learn how to open up without feeling vulnerable (or throwing tantrums).
• Ultimately, it’s up to each individual whether they want to work through these issues and pursue a committed partnership.
– If both parties are willing to put in the effort then anything is possible! But if not… well there’s always Tinder.
P.S. You should check out these commitment phobia books at Amazon. (affiliate link)